have you ever woken up drenched in a pool of tears?

that just happened to me this morning, and it was scaryyyyyy. i should have gotten up and stayed up, because in that extra 45 minutes of sleep, i experienced the most traumatic nightmare. 

anyhow, in the dream, my parents and i went on vacation, and it was our last day there (the place looked remarkably like wellington city but i don't think i dreamt i was in new zealand). anyway, my parents went off to borrow car from a friend/family member (?) and my job was to walk with them to the side of a street and wait with the luggage until they come back with the car. i waited and waited, and no one came back for me. it started raining, and some of my friends showed up and took me home with them. the entire time, i kept questioning where i was going and where my parents were, and i was very convinced that they had ditched me. as i walked away, i kept looking back at the luggage sitting on the side of the road.

and then my dad showed up, and he didn't say where he's been or what he was doing, and i kept asking him where my mom was. and he was just as confused of her whereabouts. he said that he wasn't responsible for picking up the car because mom was supposed to pick him up then pick me up. we returned to my old house (i dream about this house every time i dream about something scary), and in the midst of all this, a neighbour was beating the crap out of her kid on the front lawn. i got pissed and went over and beat the crap out of her. then i walked into the house and out onto the back porch with 911 on the line. there was a bus of kids who weren't kids (?) and a creepy guy (who looked like the master in the 3 ninjas) in our driveway. the guy came up to us and told us that's there's no hope and that we should move on.

i called 911 again and told them what this guy was telling us, that there was a huge plane that crashed on the side of a hill, crushing all the cars below it. the guy on the other line confirmed that there was such an accident, and the hill was near the street where i was waiting. suddenly, i started crying in my dream because the creepy guy told me that my mom was probably driving there during that time and that she was probably crushed to death. i didn't believe him, but he told me to ask my neighbours because three of their family members didn't make it back driving near that hill.

and then i woke up crying out for my mom. i don't know if anyone heard me, but i was super scared when i woke up. i guess lately, i've just been missing home a lot, so it makes sense that i would dream about my parents. :( maybe this is an unconscious reflection on how scared i am to have to grow up pretty soon, that i can't just rely on my parents, especially my mom, to take care of me like they did when i was six or sixteen?

the word 'break' should be redefined.

it's the second day of fall break, and i'm at my computer, trying to write midterm papers. the prompts were only given a few days ago, so it's not like i was procrastinating. but the sucky thing is, i'm actually not really getting a break during fall break. i went down to san diego for my friend's birthday yesterday, but i had to come back this evening because of all this work. booo. and who makes things due smack dab in the middle of break? i will probably not get much sleep tonight. :(

ticketmaster is evil.

the way ticketmaster works is this: they release tickets in batches and make people think that those are the only tickets left. they create sites like ticketsnow.com where you pay a hugely inflated price for tickets that should have been sold for a "normal price" on ticketmaster. they rack the convenience fees so high that sometimes it's almost double the "price" they set for the tickets. and their search engine really doesn't search for "best tickets available".

so all you can do is gamble, hoping that if you release the tickets you currently have on hand that you will get better seats somewhere else. and it's too bad that a lot of venues only work with ticketmaster now, and it's too bad that they've become the monopoly that they are.

i've been searching online and on the phone with a tm agent all morning, and both kept telling me that the only tickets left were obstructed side stage seating on the upper terrace. i nearly gave up, but...i'm going to see coldplay in anaheim on nov. 25th! my seats are still not so fantab for the price that i paid ($100 per tickets, yikes!) but they're not obstructed! i've been really wanting to see them, and i was so sure i wasn't going to get the chance to. they were in LA over the summer, but i was in texas. and then they're playing in dallas when i'm back in claremont this semester. so when i heard a couple of days ago that coldplay was coming back to the LA area, i just had to jump on the opportunity.

yay, i'm really happy. i still haven't figured out who the second ticket's going to, but i couldn't wait around for my friends from texas to confirm, so i bought two tickets just in case. my suitemate said she'll go if i can't find anyone else. :)

good things come in huge waves.

my original plan for my last semester was to work, work, work so that i could save enough money for my trip beginning in january 2009. i started looking for jobs way before summer even ended, mostly in the restaurant sector because i thought i could rack up in tips. unfortunately, a lot of places in the claremont village want somebody more long-term (than just a couple of months) and somebody with more fine dining experience (i have about a total of 4 of the 24 months under my belt). at one point, i accepted my defeat and promised myself that i would only focus on school for the rest of this semester and not let the whole no job thing get to me.

and then...in the span of two weeks, i went from jobless (except for DOS activities, but it hardly counts as a job because it's so fun and the hours are very sparse) to more opportunities thrown at me than i can handle. 

1. i ran into prof. benjamin who mentioned that he wants me to do more media-related stuff for him after fall break (i had worked on his press kits during the end of last semester and some over the summer).
2. kevin mapp (the school photographer) said that he's looking into letting me edit together the study abroad video.
3. the girl who i'll be collaborating with for a documentary about east african arts said she found funding for me (so i'll be paid, yes!)
   
4. i had a two-hour interview/chat session with a local filmmaker and her friends tonight about projects i can work on for this semester. some of them sounded really interesting, and hopefully i'll get decent pay, but i'm not very experienced. if i were hired, she's going to let me get my feet wet in all areas, but i will probably edit under this guy. i actually worked for her step-daughter in texas this past summer. it's crazy how small the world is! you really get help from connections.
5. i have an interview next tuesday for cloud 9, which is a paper shoppe in the village. this is the least relevant job to my field, but i love paper! it might sound crazy, but i actually design cards and other goodies so i have a stock of cute paper supplies for my crafts. i'm not that great, but i like to dabble in things. i really believe that now is the time for me to have odd jobs so that i can see how things are done.

i should not forget that i still have school going on though. i still have a thesis to finish. i still have my independent study project, which remains untouched. and i only have a little over two months left in claremont. i can't believe how fast time is whizzing by!